Had a huge wake up call today.
I can either dwell in my shit or pack it away start getting positive and move on with my life.
I wonder if my exboyfriend project is "dwelling"...I think I'm going to take it as a positive because I am trying to learn from it to not make the same mistakes.
I can't dwell on Spencer any more.
It is what it is and I will update it and eventually get to looking at the relationship more in depth but for now I just need to move on.
I can't change it...you can never "make" anyone do anything.
Even IF things were entirely my fault then usually with a serious relationship you get the opportunity to work on it.
I can be mad how he handled it but if I start to blame myself that really isn't going to get me anywhere I'm just going to wallow in it.
So other than any further resolution/communication that continues I will focus on making this much more positive. It must have been a drag reading this blog lately...heck I probably would have been like who is this whiny person?!
So I will fake it 'til I feel it.
I guess this gratitude thing is worth a shot in being positive.
Lets go with what I am specifically grateful for today and my challenge will be to do this daily for at least one month.
1. Grateful that my dog likes to snuggle with me and put his head in my lap as if to say...I'm here for you.
2. Grateful for having a coffee card to Tim Horton's for Christmas so I don't have to pay for it out of my "weekly cash" (hey that is $2.15 I can put towards the Burberry trench).
3. Grateful that I am able to talk via email to my far away friends when I really am feeling down in the dumps.
4. Grateful that some of my friends can get tough with me and let me know to move on and pick myself up.
5. Grateful that I have my new spin bike to spin.
6. Grateful that I can swap out my car (whose check engine light just came on) for my brothers car so that I can still make my trip up North tomorrow.
7. Grateful for packing tonight for what is sure to be an amazing weekend with some of my best friends.
xoxo
Teagan
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