This is where the Spencer story begins.
I had been working pretty steadily in Asia at this point.
Had a great core group of friends.
The dating situation however was less than ideal.
I will break it down for you in a post all about ExPat Dating.
Just to clarify an "ExPat" is someone that is working and living long term in a country where they aren't a citizen...it is short form for Expatriate.
Anywho let's just say I had made a new mantra for myself went something like this...
I will not date. I never ventured to the other side of the world to "find the man of my dreams" anyway. I'm here to grow and push my boundaries. I'm here to be uncomfortable so that I can find out who I am. I'm going to focus on my career and my friends and travel.
So just in time for my new mantra in October our work was undergoing renovations.
It was held over two weeks...one week I had to head to San Diego for a seminar but I had the week prior with nothing to do.
It was the perfect time to visit my friend Kurt in South Korea.
Kurt was my base partner from University Cheerleading.
Like a brother to me and he had moved to South Korea to do the English teaching thing at the same time I had moved to Singapore. We had been trying to figure out a good time to either meet up in another Asian country or to visit each other. So I was off to South Korea for 6 days.
I took the red eye there and arrived in Seoul.
It was crazy because (unlike Singapore) they really didn't speak English.
Though I spoke English slowly, clearly cab drivers didn't get it. I was an ignorant tourist!
I had to keep reminding myself over and over again that I wasn't in Singapore (which I consider sort of an Asia "light" and where pretty much everyone understands English).
It was so bizarre to be somewhere that you couldn't read all the signs or know what the store was from the outside. It was a pretty fun and unique experience.
As soon as I got there we went to one of his friend's place that lived in sort of an ExPat popular area.
Two girls (a Canadian and a Brit) and a guy (Canadian) shared a flat that we were going to crash at that night.
We sat around listening to music ...they had a rough night the night before.
In fact the boy had such a rough night.
thatthe girls thought it was so funny
but the boy pooper roommate was
upset they were telling me.
Haha oh well.
And thank goodness my flatmates
never did anything that disgusting!
Kurt lived in a small town near the Ocean (ie. not Seoul) which we were planning on heading to the next day.
So that night we were going to go out in Seoul to an ExPat area called Itaewon.
It is a place where there are tons of US Military and other ExPats hang becuase it is really catered towards foreigners. We planned on going to a place called Gecko's Terrace for dinner and drinks.
It was a very American bar/restaurant with your typical bar food (burgers, fries, etc) that isn't always so typical in Asian countries.
As per usual in ExPat places the number of ExPat boys>>>(so much greater than)>>>ExPat girls. Kurt took me and two other girls (Canadian and South African) there.
It was really nice because it was basically an American/Canadian bar.
However, boys kept coming up to our table and congratulating Kurt for having the company of so many girls.
SOOOOOO weird but he was totally eating it up haha.
The girls and I were by no means dressed provocatively (it was freaking cold there!)
I was wearing tights, ballet flats, a plaid skirt, and long sleeve knit sweater and scarf.
But we were getting a TON of attention so we just were talking to a lot of different people.
So service in Asian countries is NOT what it is in North America.
We had waited over 45 minutes for a drink order so at this point I was like "hey I'm just going to get a round at the bar for us."
So I head over to the crowded bar.
There is a tall guy standing in front of me (Spencer) but he keeps turns around and chatting to someone on his right...so I take the opportunity to scoot right in front of him.
He TOTALLY calls me on butting in front of him in line.
So me being sarcastic said to him "well if you need a drink that badly that you won't let a lady go first...please go right ahead."
This caught him totally off guard and he cracked a smile.
He said, "well ma'am how will we solve this?" (this peeked my interest as I totally have a soft spot for Southern boys and Military boys).
I was like "how about a game of Rock Paper Scissors?"
So we played and he killed me 2/3 times.
So I stepped back and gestered for him to go ahead.
He turned to me and said, "tell you what I have to carry back drinks for 3 guys if you help me I will buy a round for you and your friends."
That sounded like a GREAT deal to me (drinks can be really pricy in Asia).
So I agreed and we both agreed it would be funny for me to bring drinks to his friends.
(I didn't know at the time that one of the friends was his dad!)
So I did and gave them drinks according to their names (based on Spencer's descriptions).
They were kind of in shock that a person (clearly NOT a Korean waitress) knew there names and their drink preferences.
I walked back to Spencer and thanked him for our group of drinks and headed back to my table. (My friends all watched this go down too it wasn't a huge place).
So about a half hour later him and his friends ventured over.
We chatted away and you know what? I was a b*tch due to my mantra above.
I just wasn't interested. He wasn't even my type (which is basically big and muscular and looks like a "gym guy" if I was from Jersey Shore I would say it is a "juicehead gorilla" but I don't like them dumb...but this guy (Spencer) he was tall and lanky (total opposite of what I usually go for)).
Then the kicker he was trying to be all cool and said he was working in Korea but also had a business back home. He gave me a business card and he was all like "I'm CEO of this company" and I just rolled my eyes and asked him if that actually worked on girls? Then I proceeded to make fun of him for it.
We had a pretty decent banter going on and we chatted a bit but then I got distracted and talked to other people.
He asked where we were going next and I told him to ask Kurt because I didn't know where we were or where we were going as I didn't live there.
So I got caught up with the girls and the excitement of bar hopping that night and kind of ignored Spencer.
As we were walking out I just gave him a wave and never expected to see him again.
The next place we went to was called Buddha's Belly where we met 9 other girls (my friend Kurt is SUCH a ladies man haha). We were there for about an hour and then getting ready to head to the next place.
As I was coming out of the single bathroom I ran SMACK into Spencer.
I giggled and said "hi what are you doing here?"
He smiled and said "looking for you"
I admit it I was intrigued...was this guy going to follow us all over Itaewon?!
So I thought I better make this clear to him before he wastes all his time.
I said "umm you know I don't live here right?"
He said "yea I know I listened you live in Singapore"
I said "well I don't go home with guys and I probably won't see you again after tonight"
He said "I don't know about that...and I think you are worth getting to know and I don't expect you to come home with me there are other girls that look more inclined" as he nodded his head towards girls in tiny skimpy dresses in the freezing weather with EVERYthing hanging out. We both burst out laughing at how ridiculous they looked.
I said "kay well I'm here to see my friends but we are all in a group so it's cool if we all hang out."
Then we headed to another bar and this one was actual kind of sketchy.
Very R&B and hiphop but also a lot more tough looking.
The signboard menus were written in sharpy marker and a lot of 2-4-1 deals.
We were all having a good time and I just decided to chill a bit and had cranberry juice (I didn't want to be trashed).
Spencer and I had a lot of good talks actually.
Probably around 1am though he was ready to head home as we were continuing on our bar crawl...we knew it was time to move on when the 5th fight broke out and this time it was two Korean girls fighting over an American boy...classy. This was our cue to move to the next bar.
Spencer outside said to me, "hey I would really like to take you out for dinner while you're here."
I sort of shrugged and said "you know I already have basically everything planned out and we won't even be back to Seoul again until my last night and I came here to spend time with my friends"
He said "well how about a coffee? a donut? do you have any time at all that I could see you?"
You have to admire his persistance right?
So I said "kay I can do breakfast the morning before I fly out"
I half expected him to say no.
And he said, "great can I get your number?"
I honestly only had a Singapore phone number and didn't want to use it in Korea so I said "here's my email instead...see ya in a few days."
And with that he gave me a hug and he headed home.
Kurt and the rest of us girls headed out for a LONG night.
I think we got home at 5am!
The next bar was awesome and we danced until we were all sweaty and laughing and just having a great time.
I crawled into the makeshift bed on the floor (gosh I LOVED that all the heating was through the floors at that point after a cold walk home). And I fell into a blissful sleep wondering if I would really have breakfast with Spencer.
I figured I had nothing to lose it was just breakfast after all...and he wasn't even really my type...and he lived in Korea...
To be continued