Chapter X-49: Final Conversation

May 24^th 2011

Our final conversation (as per my new quit date and instructions (read here)

It was the point where I had to realize that

1. This was not good for me.

2. He had a fiancée yet was still carrying on this crazy inappropriate conversation

3. I needed to move on with my life

I was somewhat worried about the conversation that we were about to have.

I didn't know what I was going to say or how to bring it up...but I didn't have to because my lack of response that day led him to this...

 Jacob: do u not want to talk anymore

4:25 PM me: I feel like I will only end up hurt in the end

  And that is unfair

4:27 PM Jacob: then we dont have to talk

 me: K

 Jacob: that’s what u say all the time

  I’m saying that because of yr response

 me: I don't think it is weird not to want get hurt

4:29 PM But if you think that too then may as well stop now

 Jacob: then we can stop if that’s what u think

This actually makes me mad...because AGAIN he doesn't man up and make a decision...it is left up to me to do this and break things off (as it has been in the past).

4:30 PM me: I don't want to get hurt again

  And it seems like that is what u are saying

4:32 PM Jacob: i don’t know what to say

 me: K

4:33 PM Jacob: talk or not?

His indecisiveness is enough to make me want to rip my hair out!

4:35 PM me: What option hurts me less?

 Jacob: not talking i guess

4:37 PM me: Ouch

  Well at least you are being honest

5 minutes

4:42 PM Jacob: idk what u should do

4:43 PM me: K

4:45 PM Jacob: ?

4:47 PM me: Don't worry about me

4:48 PM Jacob: what do u mean

4:49 PM me: I think you have broken my heart enough times I would have figured it out by now but clearly I haven’t

Here’s were Captain obvious delivers the blow…

 Jacob: I’m with someone

4:50 PM me: K

6 minutes

This made me so upset...like REALLY??? REALLY??? you are with someone and this is how you behave???  Then you throw it in my face?!?!?!

4:56 PM me: Maybe you should consider that before saying the things you say

4:57 PM Jacob: we are both at fault

This statement made me steaming mad…like really??? We are both at fault…the last I checked I wasn’t in a relationship…but then I guess I was at fault knowing his situation…my excuse (though poor) is that I was in such a deep dark place and he was familiar and comfortable and saying all the right things

5 minutes

5:02 PM me: K

5:03 PM Jacob: right?

32 minutes

5:35 PM Jacob: ?

I thought he didn’t deserve a response…I was mad…and thinking that I just need to move on.  That was the last day I responded to him.

But not the last day I heard from him...