Trip to see Taylor!!!!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Am I Bleating/Chlogging?

Okay real quick.
I may be bleating/chlogging (blog cheating/cheating at bloggin).
In the midst of buckling down the next few weeks (until the 17th of Feb).
I have blogged "ahead" so the posts might seem disjointed (MORE than usual) or off topic.
So I apologize if this is "wrong" in blogging but I wanted to have something for people to read that is new (kind of) especially to my three followers (yea!!!) because I know I like to check blogs daily :)

So I have a 3 tests in and around the 17th to allow me to work my profession in Canada.
I have to pass or I have to wait until June for retakes.
I'm nervous.
I didn't think this would be happening weeks ago and now it is.
I feel kind of bummed because in a  huge way it feels like settling.
Like taking a bad deal.
Like working the circumstances you are dealt instead of reaching for your dreams blah blah blah.
It feels more like I "have" to rather than "want" to.
I'm not complaining (really) I'm taking these things and running with them.
Like one of my bestie's Eva says "try it for a year.  You can do almost anything for a year." 
So this is me putting in my year haha.

I'm buckling down and becoming a hermit until after the 17th!
And then I will celebrate and reach for my dreams.
And figure it all out and really get back to myexboyfriend project.
And deal with Spencer (who I haven't spoken to since the 15 minute argument conversation HERE).
It has been more than 4 weeks but whatever.
He is something I will have to wait for time to pass so it doesn't cut so deep/hurt so bad.
And I always have Jacob to keep me on my toes... more to come on that.
Back to preparing for these yucko tests.

PS I still will check and reply to comments of course...I can't really really stay away for that long!
PPS I totally just realized the 17th is would have been my one year engagement/wedding anniversary isn't THAT ironic.  My my how things can totally suck...your life can fall apart...suck you into a hole of depression    change in just a year.  Which means my life could be amazing in just one short year.  Taylor gives me hope.  Hmm lets check back in 2012 and see.  I'm crossing all my toes and fingers.


  1. Remember, you have NO idea what your future holds. This might not be what you CHOSE, but this might be an amazing path that leads you to your destiny!

    I cried and cried and cried for MONTHS about the outcome and path of my life two years ago. I hated myself and how my life was turning out and where it went and where it was going (and in SO many different ways). BUT...if that shitty awful mess got me to where I am today, I'd do it all over again a hundred times over.

  2. okay, i totally didn't see that PPS when I wrote that comment!!! (Either you added it as I was commenting or I'm just a total dumb blonde today! haha)

  3. I addede that PPS when I posted it and realized that it was February 17th. And of give me hope. Even as we are subconsciously writing at the same time. Remember the Sex and the City where Charlotte comes to the realization that maybe her girlfriends are her soulmates. You are mine!...obviously from us writing at the same time haha. Love you and all the support and kicks in the butt you give me! xoxo

  4. I love your read ahead posts!! What a brilliant idea. I wish I was so organized - I would do the same!

    Aw, I LOVE how you and Goldilocks are on the exact same page - even in reminding yourself to remember everything happens for a reason, even though it's so fresh right now.

  5. @pinksundrops- Thanks :) I think it is more of me trying NOT to procratinate close to these tests rather than actual organization haha. I am so lucky to have AMAZING girlfriends (like you!) and I am loving haveing blogger followers/friends too which has been a huge support.

  6. Nothing wrong with blogging ahead of time. I always think that would be a good idea. And never do it. Procrastination is my friend.

    Eva is TOTALLY right. You can do anything for a year. So pass those darn tests so that you can have something happy to remember the 17th by!

  7. Thanks A :) Is it bad to wish this year would hurry up and be over?! haha