|Ever have the feeling that people say you look nice that day because you've put so much effort into it so no one actually realizes you are totally and utterly bummed out?! Today was a day like that...|
So after much contemplation.
I figured I should reach out for the small sliver of
So after endless cycles of typing then erasing then typing then erasing
I finally sent this at 11:47am...
Hi :) haven't heard from you in a few days...everything ok?
And I try to not cycle through the following thoughts and things ....
~the things like glancing at each other from inside his car and both of us breaking into silly big goofy grins
~his sweet gestures like a croissant and water waiting for me that Sunday morning before we went to that wine tasting even (here)
~him blaming missing a turn because I was beautifully distracting
~the make out until 3am on his friends couch (during this date)
~him explaining how at both dinners he was jumping down outside with excitement over looking at me inside
~asking me in front of his friends how I manage to look so beautiful from every angle
~driving in his car and rubbing his arm and him saying "I love when you do that"
~him taking my hand and putting it on the back of his neck and shoulder on our way home from Niagara to Toronto when I had done it earlier in the trip and he wanted it some more
~him stopping on his way to the bathroom to kiss me quickly during our lunch out
and then the confusion sets in
I just don't get it
And it's obviously starting to be a little scary reminiscent of MM and Spencer and this freaks me right the heck out!
At this point it is about 9 HOURS since I sent the message.
That alone is such a bad bad BAD sign.
SO obviously still so cranky.
Pic from here