I'm still not busy enough which has me worried.
The nature of my work is I need to be busy to do well.
Then yesterday I got in my car (at least the week was done).
And go to start the car and it makes a bunch of clicking sounds (sort of like a dead battery).
Except all the lights were flashing including the front lights.
The car sort of started after I let it rest for a few minutes.
And I desperately flipped through the owners manual ...and I think it is the automatic transmission where it says basically pull your car over and call a tow.
|Haha I wish this was me. Better keep on with that running.|
Anywho my dad called me then (weird right).
And offered to exchange me cars on Sunday so he could have his mechanic look at it in my hometown and I could have a useable car for work.
Which is pretty awesome.
So then I slowly drove home and sighed with relief as I glided into Eva's driveway.
But I was supposed to sleep over at Quinn and her husbands house tonight.
We were going to go see Harry Potter (FINALLY) and go out for dinner and I was completely looking forward to it all week.
She just messaged me to see what time I would be there.
I had to respond I can't because now I have no car.
And they live about 45 minutes away on the highway a few cities over.
Though Jane and Eva and her husbands cars are all here I don't think it would be appropriate to borrow their cars for that far of a trip.
So now I'm stuck here until tomorrow.
I'm already so lonely and bored out of my mind.
Because it was Canada my home county, I did not anticipate as difficult of a transition.
I didn't expect these feelings to remind me of when I've moved to other countries and after the initial first week shine wears off...the first 3-6 months are always the most difficult.
The most lonely and the hardest as you navigate to find yourself comfortable and try and grow a big group of friends and a full social calendar...from scratch...again.
I cannot wait to try and make more friends.
Just not sure exactly how to do that.
And all this boredom and loneliness...
well it makes me want to respond to Jacob.
Who STILL messages me everyday.
Case and point...this mornings email.
6 August, 2011 7:02 AM (hmmm maybe he is having as hard a time sleeping as I am)
I miss you, you were right about everything. I want to come to Canada and see you, you were right.
And right now I just want to reply.
I just want to be wanted and loved.
And I know I shouldn't respond.
And I'm annoyed at myself for wanting to.
Gosh it was so much easier to not respond when I had other options in mind (ie. MM).
Pic from here here and here