(well technically it's on Monday but my familiy celebrates on Sunday usually).
This is beginning of our holiday season.
Which is always the worst for me.
I don't do well with the holidays when I'm single.
Which I guess I should get used to.
So Saturday bright and early I headed back to my home town and got my roots touched up.
I had plans to hang out with Shelby.
So we grabbed a quick dinner before the Kings of Leon concert (that I was able to get last minute tickets for).
Sad to say it was one of the two songs I actually recognized the whole night.
We had a few drinks there.
Then met up with her friends to go out.
They were her friends from baseball.
And my first group of lesbians I have ever met.
And what do I say (aka how can I put my foot in my mouth the best?!)
So one of the girls Isabella says, "do you play baseball?"
To which I laugh and reply "no I always grew up taking dance and cheerleading...I don't play sports with balls" (which is true and I've said that before because it explains that I'm awful when it comes to baseball, soccer, volleyball etc).
To which the whole group bursts into laughter.
And I was super embarrased.
I would say THAT.
Anywho they were a really fun group.
And then I got an email from Ryan.
Well here is a quick catch up of who Ryan is (because I'm WAY behind on myexboyfriendproject).
Ryan went to graduate school with me.
We are the same profession.
We dated (BRIEFLY like maybe 4 dates) during school.
He would be the one I went on a few dates before I fell head over heels for Jacob originally.
We have remained friends since school.
His best friend was working in Singapore (and who I lived with my first 6 weeks there).
Within 4 weeks of myself arriving Ryan planned to move out to Singapore.
When he did come to visit (2 months before he actually moved there).
He wanted to date again when he moved to Singapore.
However I had just started dating Brian.
So I said it wouldn't be a good idea.
So he moved to Singapore with his girlfriend (they actually lived with me for 4 weeks).
They got married this September 17th (isn't that an awful coincidence)...
They did a short honeymoon so I had dinner with them in Niagara Falls 2 weeks ago.
Ryan is moving back to Singapore (without his newlywed wife initially).
Anywho I was VERY wasted when I got his email at 11:07
Hey how are things
Keep in touch
if it goes well over here I will see what I can do for you,
that is if you're still interested when the time comes.
I know there are two new offices opening in Singapore and one in Hong Kong and one in Vietnam
So there is definitely room for you.
Hope life's getting better and easier
To which I very drunkingly replied...
Get me out of here
Jacob broke off his engagement
I'm freaking out
Ever feel lik you are going down this deep wrong path
I'm freaking out
Need to likely leave here
(HOLY way to have no inhibitions Teagan!!! ughhhh how humiliating/or is it truthful???)
Yeah I'm always heading down the wrong path lol j/k
well keep in touch let me know whats going on and we will figure it out for ya :) Ryan
To which I (seriously this is so embarrasing to tell you) replied
Jacob broke off his engagement
I'm freaking out and I need to get out of here ASAP
(and this sounds so desperate and it wasn't like I was sad...I was doing shots at the bar during this!)
LOL ok I got you
You don't want to end up with Jacob and before you do something stupid you want me to save you :)
HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAY :)
I'm sorry I'm so damaged
(OK for the record I don't know where THAT came from).
Then he drops this BOMB...
Hate to say it this way but where would we be if we would have dated and stayed together????
WHAT is up with BOYS doing this???
So I try to brush it off with a...
FYI it's thanksgiving Canada and I'm wasted.
Got ya...wasted huh :) well happy Thanksgiving...
when is Jacob coming to see you or is he not made that commitement yet???
I'm happy I mean we are separated right now that stinks but I think everything will be fine...
I'm just saying I wonder what would have happened if you chose to date me long term or you weren't dating Brian when I came to Singapore I reflect back thats all...
For better or worse we are where we are for a reason I suppose :)
FYI if you had moved to Singapore single things would have been different
(I really don't know where that came from)
I know lol
And I didn't mean that in a snottyt way just the way we were talking before I left to see you...
there was definitely somehting there :)
AND THEN MY PHONE DIED
So Sunday morning I wrote this back
Wow so sorry about last night
I was way too inebriated
No worries about everything:)
Like you said everytthing happens for a reason
Or so they say :)
I was embarrased.
AND I was throwing up viciously all morning.
It was awful
My head was pounding.
When I looked into the mirror and my puffy face and mascara smeared eyes.
I didn't know who I was.
With that I hopped in the shower to try and shower the hangover away
(It didn't work).
Then I headed to my parents house to do Thanksgiving with the family.
Ate the requisite Turkey.
Then packed up the car and headed back home to Toronto.
I didn't want to be there any longer.
So if you are wondering...
Yes I have a VERY strong urge to move back to Asia.
I'm incredibly frustrated about Jacob.
And right now I don't have any desire to drink again haha.