So here's how my trip went down.
It kind of started off bad.
The fact that I've had to rent a car since my car broke down.
Or that I even had difficulty picking up the rental car (from the shady car rental place).
Then a rough day of work on the day we left.
Picking up Laurel from her work place.
Getting caught in traffic.
As we drove and day turned into night.
Laurel fell fast asleep.
Which sucks because I was exhausted.
So I decided to stop in Syracuse versus Utica.
Exhausted and rolling into bed.
And finding out Laurel sleeps with a sound machine.
Sounds kind of like a staticy channel turned up really loud.
So I slept like crap.
Finally making it into Boston.
After Laurel who refused to find an address and insisted she was right in directions.
So we missed eating at the lunch place that we wanted to eat at.
And I just got quiet (mainly because I was starving because I opted for a coffee only breakfast because I hate McDonald's breakfast).
We then toured Harvard University which was awesome and I got a token sweatshirt.
Then we headed to the W (which I love).
We started to get ready.
And Laurel thought the sink was broken (turned out it was not she only had the plug in activated).
Then she forgot her makeup in the car (which was parked a little a ways in valet).
The stadium was 15 minutes walk away but Laurel's boots were too uncomfortable to walk in so we cabbed it.
But totally missed the opening (one of my favourite parts of the game is the introduction of the teams).
It is the first game I've been to in a couple of years and yeah I was pretty disappointed.
After the game was over I was really looking forward to a night out in Boston (our only real night "out" on the trip). So we snagged a seat at the bar at the W which was promptly filling up.
Laurel was tired and wasn't really in the mood but did decide to have one drink.
Then went to bed.
I stayed for one more but then decided to just head up.
The next morning I got up early to work out in the am.
When I came back Laurel let me know her one sugary drink effected her badly so we wouldn't be making the 9am tour.
So I showered and got ready and tried to figure out what to do.
We ended up going on a different (and now unresearched tour).
We thought it was weird being on a Freedom Trial tour and 90 minutes in had only visited two sites.
Now I was thinking...wow we ended up selecting the wrong kind of focused tour and not a generalized one like we wanted to originally.
Laurel was saying out loud..."this is b*llsh*t I'm asking for a refund because this is NOT the freedom trial tour"...and was saying this LOUDLY.
And I was embarrassed.
And irritated.
And the rest of our day was similarly downhill.
I'm realized in spending 24/7 with Laurel at this point in the trip that she is quite negative.
Also reminded me of my mum in complaining about everything.
It was like wearing a wet blanket all weekend long.
And it got worse.
We went to our sorority meeting where we (granted unexpectedly) had to add an extra girl to our room.
Laurel went so mean girls on this new roommate that she was in tears 10 minutes in.
Seriously.
I busied myself trying to smooth things over.
Reassuring the new roommate that she was not intruding and apologizing for Laurel behaviour.
And trying to deescalate Laurel's meangirl routine.
That by the end of the weekend I was exhausted.
There are more details that I just am too exhausted to even write out it full.
It just stinks that this may be my only trip of the year and this is how it went.
Bad trip indeed.
Totally feel like I'm on autopilot.
As per usual a feeling of unrest.
Ever feel a half beat behind?
It reminds me of being able to spot cheerleaders (my sport of choice) if they were "cheating" and following teammates choreography...super easy to pick up on because they were always about half a beat behind.
Only it sort of feels like that is happening to me in real life.
As I'm slugging through this job.
Dating/not dating/sort of dating.
Seeing old friendships melt away/new ones develop/finding my groove but not finding my groove...
Watching everyone else's lives HAPPEN.
The countless foray of birthdays/baby showers/engagements/weddings/etc.
(I'm pretty sure I'm using foray incorrectly but it sounds right at this moment).
The things that seem to be happening for everyone else (but me).
Doesn't help this morning that one of my old flatmates from Singapore facebooked me to invite me to his wedding...in 19 days.
With the lovely reminder "you promised you would come to my wedding".
I also figured I would have more than 19 days notice to get to the other side of the world!
Nevermind the last minute flight cost is hovering around the $3000 mark and would involve me flying out 8amish on a Thursday arrive at 6:20pm on a Friday...wedding Saturday and having to leave Sunday at 11:30pm and arrive back Monday at 12:10pm...I would officially spend more time in the air then on the ground!
I honestly wouldn't think twice if I had the money but between my Kate Spade splurge's in Dallas and being a little social butterfly...I'm stretched super thin financially...them's the breaks when you are flying solo.
But the guilt I feel...sucks.
Along with the slight emerald eyed twinge of when the F*CK will it ever be my turn.
I'm in a totally pissy mood.
Which is NOT very becoming.
Something's got to change...
So after my Friday night first date with MrPhD.
I got up bright and early to head to Kingston to meet the girls.
I headed up to Jane and her husband's house and was joined shortly after by Brooke, Brooke's daughter Calla, and Val.
It was great because Sophie and her daughter had flown in from Winnipeg too.
We had all kinds of food.
Of course this app is the only pic I took.
Oops.
So we had a big BBQ and sat outside drinking and eating.
Then we headed to Menchie's in downtown Kingston...I guess they have locations in Toronto too.
It's a franchise of Frozen Yogurt stores where you mix and match and pay by the weight of your concoction.
We all enjoyed!
Plus Kim Kardashian likes it too (always a bonus in my book!)
Then we headed back to Jane's house.
And one by one the girls' headed to their homes
(they are all from around Kingston except me!)
So I crashed at Jane's place.
Oh and turns out Val forgot to bring home Jane's gift to Eva.
So now it's in my trunk as I debate what the heck to do with that.
(Likely give it to Val to give to Eva...
since I STILL have not seen Eva since the St.Patrick Day fiasco!)
The next morning we woke up.
Jane and her husband had plans to head to a friends cottage.
So I puttered around getting ready to go to Brooke's parents place to hang out with her and Calla.
It was Calla's birthday again this year (7!!!)
I also got to hang out with them last year when Calla turned 6.
If you missed it you can read about it here.
It was also around the time I was dating MM....how WEIRD it was a year ago.
I had yet to move to Toronto and things felt abundantly positive.
Anyway we filled our day with going to Costco and ToysRUs and picking up an ice cream cake from a Marble Slab Creamery.
We did find some time to sneak to the park.
Calla and I hopped on the swings.
I wore my traditional Canada Day outfit (same as last year!)...so obviously I'm the one in the white dress haha.
Then Brooke's big family all came over.
And it was sort of weird.
In the sense that at times I was bored.
And at times I felt lonely.
It was a weird mix of feelings all together.
The realization that I'm soon coming up to a year in the TDot.
The year of commitment I forced myself to try before giving up on Canada.
Thinking I would feel totally settled by now but instead I feel a lot more insecure about everything.
This year over the long weekend I was messaging three boys instead of one.
So I suppose that is an upgrade...sort of.
I don't know just a feeling of weirdness all around.
Then Sunday night while I slept in Brooke's parents guest room I had a total restless sleep.
I had this CRAZY dream about Will...like a crazy inappropriate dream.
Maybe because I found out this week he broke up with his girlfriend ....though there has never been any weird sexual tension or anything between us.
Clearly I'm just in a weird place.
So Monday I woke up early had Calla's birthday breakfast of chocolate chip pancakes made by Brooke's mum.
Then I hopped on the road to head back to the TDot.
Which left me with 3+ hours of driving/thinking time.
And just a general feeling of unrest.
Something about this weekend felt very unsettling.
And I can't put my finger on what that is...
So Friday right after work I bolted home.
Then headed for Val's new place downtown.
She made the leap and moved from a two bed apartment in Bloor West to a new AMAZING downtown one bedroom.
She had only been there less than two weeks but seems pretty settled into it.
We opened a bottle of wine and decided to make dinner before heading out downtown.
We made a pasta with shrimp/lemon/wine/oregano.
I should have taken pics but I'm not quite there with these things yet.
Mostly because it's not like I'm going to say "it's for my blog".
So we have a great dinner and then get dolled up to head out on a Friday night.
First we headed to Brassaii
(the same place I went for Brunch with Will and the boys in this post).
Which is interesting that it goes from a club into a chic brunch place in just a few hours.
It was a very cool place.
But a tad too clubey.
Even though we were dolled up we were more in jeans and cute tops versus other women in teeny tiny minis with sky high heels.
It was a little more "meatmarket" than we prefer so then we moved on.
We literally just walked down King West until we found a place that looked interesting called Spice Route.
A much better atmosphere.
So we settled in had a couple of Gin & Tonics (my new fav drink), before calling it a night at around 1am.
So great to take an $8 cab home versus $60+ from my place.
Val definitely has an amazing cool new place and I am super duper ridiculously jealous
(ie. I'm dying to live closer to the action).
It was also a great night because I shared a few texts with MrClarkKent though I tried not to be "that girl" that stays huddled with her phone because of a boy.
I debated playing coy like I MAYBE was on another date etc.
He asked me what I was up to that night...I first replied with "Shenanigans" being all coy...before relenting and telling him about our girls night...
So with him I don't think I'll play games (though I am sticking semi to TheRules).
Another weird thing happened last night that I sort of brushed off but lingered with me.
As things tend to do.
And it made me think back to something I HAVEN'T mentioned since my trip to Ottawa (that I wrote about here).
So first the story from Ottawa that I never mentioned...(read here).
So Friday night as we were cooking dinner.
It went down like this...
Val: wow you can REALLY smell this cheese in the fridge
Me: Fun! Cheese is great. Did you go to somewhere new to get it?
Val: No just the grocery store because Jane and her husband are coming by tomorrow...(she pauses)...
Me: (thinking INSIDE my head- ummm weird Jane is in town from Kingston (3 hours away)...and didn't text or anything...)
Val: Yea so did she message you?
Me: Nope
Val: Yea her brother had their baby and she is going to be in town so I offered for her to stay over tonight but they are staying with her husbands inlaws...so they are going to come by tomorrow afternoon because they haven't seen my new place.
Me: (thinking INSIDE my head because I have zero balls- Jane STILL hasn't come to see my new place. She drives by it as in you can SEE it when you drive by, each time she comes to Toronto from Kingston. They drive 30 minutes OFF the main highway to get to Eva's house. Val lives more than half an hour off the main highway too! But still no bother to even come here. Nevermind THAT no mention that you are even here in this city at all...F*CK!)...what I actually said was..."cool"
And we moved on to another topic.
Maybe Jane and Eva are just over with their friendship with me.
Maybe if I actually had the guts to say something I would figure it out.
But I don't.
Because the pain of that actually being true or me being faulted for whatever it is...
doesn't seem worth it yet.
How strange because Jane had messaged me a week or so ago
(to which I IMMEDIATELY replied by the way)
where she invited herself along to Ottawa for the long weekend in May if I go.
To which I said of course to.
Because I cannot bare to exclude someone...apparently even if they do the same exact thing to me.
Would it be that hard to include me over to see Jane and her husband at Val's Saturday afternoon?
Would it be hard for Jane and her husband to stop by for 5 minutes to check out my new place on their way out of Toronto?
I already know the answers to that.
And with that I just turned this semi fun post.
Into a b*tch fest.
Fan-f*cking-tastic.
