Scary Sunday

So Sunday I had this CRAZY day.
Because I had signed up to do something.
Only I was so terrified I didn't tell y'all about it.
Because I was worried about failing.


You see I enjoy working out.
However, I don't consider myself to be in great shape by any means.
I'm not an athlete with an amazing flat stomach (I'm talking about you SoMidwestern).
Or a fabulous swimmer with the best back/shoulder/tiny legs ever (like MrsArchitect).
Or just really the overall petite pretty package/amazing body of AustinSunDrops.


Anywho.
So I did something unthinkable for me.
I signed up for a 5K.

Not just any 5K but an obstacle 5K that seems to be all the rage right now.
The Best Obstacle Race Outside for 2012.
And one that actually penalizes you for incomplete obstacles.


The SpartanSprint.
I know I know what was I thinking?!?!
I hate dirt and mud.
I'm girly and I like sports that allow you to wear makeup!


I signed up with Val (who happens to be a phys ed teacher).
Which meant she would be really good.
So I was super worried about dragging her down.


She tried to calm me down.
We started with a BIG breakfast.

Took some ridiculous posing before shots.

And than the rain came SLAMMING down.
And as we shivered in line waiting for the start announcement.
I panicked.
I thought there is no way I can do this!


I dragged Val 2 hours north of Toronto to participate in something 
I'm not going to be able to complete.
And Val saw the look of panic in my eyes.
High fived me and said "we can do this".


And as I blinked through the pouring rain we started off.
And I thought.
Okay I can do this.

Then the hills started.
And I was going to fast.
And all of a sudden it was like my heart rate got too fast.
I totally gassed out within the first 2km!


And I couldn't.
And I panicked again.
And I was humiliated and frustrated and embarrassed.

And I thanked God for the rain because then you couldn't tell I was crying.
And as I sniffled and tried to pull myself together...
Val slowed her pace and said, 
"its okay just keep running, we'll go at whatever pace you need".
And I trudged.


And with each step I thought.
I can't do this.
I'm not made for this.
This is not what I'm into.


Then we got to the first obstacle.
Under netting dragged down with mud and leaves and rain and straight up hill.
And for every crawl step forward I seemed to slide down even more.


But I could hear Val ahead of me... "come on Teagan".
And with the first obstacle done I thought "okay here we go".
And as we knocked down the obstacles one by one. 
I grew a little stronger with each obstacle.


By the end I was exhausted and covered in mud.
And I almost didn't make it over the last obstacle.
Val literally yanked me over.


So so lucky to have an amazing friend like her.
And as I bowed my head to have a finisher's medal placed around my neck.
I practically sobbed (again good thing for the rain).
I did it.


I did what I thought I could not do.
All the way along I told myself I couldn't.
Then I did.


I had one of my best friend's Val by my side the whole time.
Even though she had to sacrifice her challenge for me.
(It was one of my worst fears...that I would drag her down.)


I know she sacrificed running her race so that I could complete mine.
I try not to let the guilt get to me.
Instead i'm trying to focus on... that is what true friend are made of.
And as I sit here with my banged, bruised and battered legs.

Gross evidence of a race.

I know I shouldn't be so afraid.
I should go for the things I want.
Even when I don't have faith in myself.
My ability is there.
It is within my grasp.
I just have to dig deep.
(And having a few good friends sure does help!)